Friday, May 7, 2010

Box Office Conversations...

Below are actual conversations that have occurred in the box office over the last week. Names have been removed to protect the stup-...I mean... innocent...

The "We're Sold Out" Conversation

Customer: I need 2 tickets for Thursday the 6th. I have the 2-4-1 coupon.

Jeff: I'm sorry, but we are sold out for every performance.

Customer: What about Sunday the 16th.

Jeff: It's sold out, too. Every performance is sold out.

Customer: Well, what night do you have available?

Jeff: We are totally sold out.

Customer: But I have the 2-4-1 coupon...

The "Waiting List" Conversation

Jeff: I have a waiting list for each performance.

Customer: How does that work?

Jeff: If we receive a cancellation, we call the person at the top of the waiting list.

Customer: When will someone cancel?

Jeff: I have no idea.

Customer: So, I just have to wait?...

The "Seating Preference" Conversation

Jeff: Do you have a seating preference?

Customer: I'd like pretty close, like 10 to 12 rows from the stage.

Jeff: We only have 15 rows in the theatre.

Customer: Well, I don't want to sit at the back...

The "Tickets Are Nonrefundable Once Purchased" Conversation (My personal favorite)

Customer: I would like to put those on my Visa.

Jeff: Tickets are nonrefundable once purchased.

Customer: What does that mean?

Jeff: ....I can't give you your money back....

Customer: ...Oh...

Sure, they're funny now...

Friday, April 23, 2010

Puppy Power!

A few weeks ago, I became the proud parent of Tucker! Tucker is a recued puppy and has more love in him than any puppy I've ever encountered! He will, sometimes, stop whatever he's doing just to run up to me and give me a big, wet kiss, then he goes back about his business.

I had a friend over last night who is going through a tough time. She has been employed at the local college for 30 years and just lost her job due to downsizing... She came over to hang out and try to get her mind off of things. Before she left, she let Tucker sit on her lap and he began to kiss every inch of her face! A few times, he would stop and lay his head on her, but then it was back to kissing! We laughed hysterically! When my friend left, the smile on her face could have been seen from space. I would like to think that my company had something to do with it, but I think Tucker's kisses really did the trick!

I'm so glad Tucker came into my life, as corny as that sounds... Who'd have thought a puppy could turn me into the mush-ball I am today.... Thanks, Tucker!

Monday, April 19, 2010

Dear, Monday...

So, we meet again. If you're one thing, you're reliable.

My weekend was going pretty good until about 10:00 last night when I could feel you looming in the air. Don't you ever feel guilty for what you do to humankind? You rape us of the freedom that Saturday and Sunday feel we deserve. Because of you, bosses and teachers around the world deem it nessesary to make us all return to work and school. I'm convinced that you have a deal with Father Time, making the hours go by slower than the other days of the week. I don't even want to know what you promised that old man in return.

When it comes down to it, Monday, I have trust issues. I don't trust YOU! I don't trust you as far as I can throw you, and since I can't really get my hands on you, we'll never know how far that really is. I've tried calling you to set up an appointment to meet, but you never answer the phone and your voice mail is always full. I probablly wouldn't check my messages either if I were you. Perhaps you should consider a complaint department.

Basically, I would like to ask this of you- be kind to my friends and myself today. Show us that you do have compassion for us. Prove to us that you can just be another day of the week. There's still time to get on our good sides. 16 hours to be exact. Don't make us carry a grudge all week.


Sunday, April 18, 2010

I Just Lost My Blogging Virginity...

For the past year and a half, I've been on Facebook. It's become sort of goal for me to crack people up each day with my status updates. It seems to work. Some people take their status updates so seriously, then there are the people who seem to think others care that they "just got home from work." There are also the people who never post anything at all. Me, well, I've just always been a fan of making people laugh. Yes, sometimes I might get a little sappy. I'm even guilty of wishing a happy holiday every now and then. My Facebook fame (I use the word "fame" loosely) seems to come from my posts dealing with my hatred of Mondays and my love of Fridays. In fact, I have been asked several times to demonstrate my "Friday Dance" that I mention a lot. Sometimes, I get so many requests for it, I start to think that I really should come up with one. Honestly, I'm just addicted to hearing the words "I loved your post today." I am a performer, after all. I'll take praise anywhere I can get it, even if it means blogging. So, I raise my coffee cup to my Facebook friends. Thank you for making me branch out to other means of entertaining people, because there are days when 1 sentence just isn't enough. Maybe, someday, I'll hear the words "I loved your blog today!" What's 1 more profile to keep up with anyway, right?