Dear, Monday...

So, we meet again. If you're one thing, you're reliable.

My weekend was going pretty good until about 10:00 last night when I could feel you looming in the air. Don't you ever feel guilty for what you do to humankind? You rape us of the freedom that Saturday and Sunday feel we deserve. Because of you, bosses and teachers around the world deem it nessesary to make us all return to work and school. I'm convinced that you have a deal with Father Time, making the hours go by slower than the other days of the week. I don't even want to know what you promised that old man in return.

When it comes down to it, Monday, I have trust issues. I don't trust YOU! I don't trust you as far as I can throw you, and since I can't really get my hands on you, we'll never know how far that really is. I've tried calling you to set up an appointment to meet, but you never answer the phone and your voice mail is always full. I probablly wouldn't check my messages either if I were you. Perhaps you should consider a complaint department.

Basically, I would like to ask this of you- be kind to my friends and myself today. Show us that you do have compassion for us. Prove to us that you can just be another day of the week. There's still time to get on our good sides. 16 hours to be exact. Don't make us carry a grudge all week.

Sincerely,
Jeff